I used to be a fit fanatic. Seriously, I mean I would go to the gym 5 days a week most weeks, I would run (best I could... endurance was never one of my strong points) I ate healthy, I ate clean. I even asked my mum for protein supplements.I was one of those super annoying fit freaks who would refuse to eat bread, and abstained from chocolate and allowed myself a Rich Tea with my tea once every evening. Regardless, I was pretty happy with myself. In fact physically, I was happier than I had been since before I was old enough to think about what I looked like. I even had abs. I remember the thrill of seeing my thighs tone up, my butt lift and my arms shape up delightfully. Physically, I was in the best shape of my life! This didn't last forever evidently.
Things began to get in the way, and when I couldn't get to the gym so much any more, my body slowly began to shrink back to pre- fit fanatic Jen. Needless to say, I didn't notice to much at first but after a little while, I started to eat bread again ( I know! The horror) only brown bread... once in a while...
Back in July 2013 God really picked me up off my rear end and gave me a swift kick up it in the right direction again. My spiritual fitness became unlike anything I'd ever known before. It was realer than ever; more fervent than ever. I fell in love deeper and stronger with the Savior than ever before. I was training spiritually, praying, serving, reading and everyone knew it. Since then there's been growth like never before.
God had spoken, was speaking, was using me. It was incredible. It is incredible. 2014 has just finished. A year unlike anything I've every experienced. Where the Heavens rain, sometimes it will flood. This has been the most difficult yet prosperous year of my life so far.
However, not unlike my physical blossoming, my spiritual training will not always be at that constant high.
I've been feeling that down recently. Feeling the lack of motivation to seek Christ like I did even several months ago. Surely the same Lord who did all these wondrous is motivation enough to seek and praise? It should be. But I've began to find myself in the same depletion and the previously mentioned physical state.
The night before Christmas eve, I stayed with a relative and I took my bible with me. I decided on my night of relaxation I would read, and pray, and see if God would speak. Who was I kidding, of course He would. I opened to Revelations and began to read the first chapter. As I read I saw it spoke of the different churches. Many times I've heard my pastor speak of the Church of Laodicea- the church that needs nothing. There was also the church of the Ephesians.
Now, Ephesians is my favorite letter from Paul. I just always feel like it's the most applicable; the most relatable to the modern church serving today, a reminded to never forget the first love of Christ. And within this chapter of Revelations, I realised I am becoming what I always dreaded I would become- I'm becoming cold; unfit. Beginning to eat the white bread of this world again- beginning to forget the blessings joy and strength only accumulated through Christ himself.
Just like my burst of gyming and fitness, my spiritual bloom has began to whither down slightly- almost as of the radioactive- glow is burning off. That which I never wanted to happen.
I have to say though. I did not become "unfit" after I stopped going to the gym. I became merely a
less strong, toned version of my prior self.
As I said. I've been in a kind of suckie place recently, feeling almost depressed. Perhaps there are several causes which I shan't delve into but I know for sure a positive mental attitude is not enough to "pull me up". I went for a run tonight with my father, after having one of those struggling to be human days. The first run of this year, and in about a month and a half. The first 70% wasn't bad! Almost easy in fact. There was a little wind but nothing significant that could hold me back. The second part of our route was heavily uphill. We walked about a hundred meters around the corner at the bottom of the big hill for a short rest, then went for the incline- at a quicker pace. Deep breath and off we trodded. And it was difficult. I didn't get far before I had to pause again. This incline brought a change of direction which meant the wind was now against us and genuinely stronger. After several defeatist stops I was still in a foul mind, and said aloud, "God seriously why does there have to be wind against me right now?!" Oh, hello Holy spirit! The answer was almost entirely representative of what was happening in my life.
We're all running a race. If we're surrendered to Christ, we're called to run the race with endurance. There will always be hills. Sometimes up, sometimes down. There will be wind sometimes, and sometimes it will be against you.
I approached my waiting father he asked me about my bad mood. I explained my anger about the difficulty and we pressed on together as he encouraged me a little each time. Eventually I told him to run on without me as I slowed to a walk. Again I prayed aloud as though I was having Revelations of my own.
I knew that as soon as I ran again, I would be on my way to safety; to home; back to my daddy. I knew that this wind was shaping endurance in me. This hill reminding me it's not always easy. My father reminding me Jesus is not far away.
Revelations 2 verse 7 says - "To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree
of life, which is in the Paradise of God."
To him who overcomes, there is victory. There's a right in paradise so eat in the glory of God. Not just physical nutrients, but spiritual fruit in the presence of Christ. That's pretty awesome. There's constant battles, hills and winds in this life. Sometimes you need to slow down, sometimes you need to start running again. We all have our own race but we need to know that we need to stay fit spiritually. This life is not a sprint. If we start a marathon at our fastest pace, we'll be done not 5 minutes in. If we pace ourselves, nourish ourselves in the word and drink of the living water and eat the living bread, we won't become tired. We can face the wind and hills. We don't need to sprint in everything, but rely steadily on the promises of Jesus, moreso the personal promises.
Another thing the Ephesians were famous for was their image. They acted and spoke as though they were still serving God from the heart- they dressed like an athlete although they didn't train like an athlete. Sometimes I wear my gym leggings around the house because it's comfier than jeans to chill in. Same idea- are you dressed in your Holy Holister's and Nikes (no copyright) so that you'll look as though you're running when really you're doing the gym posers so you can instagram the every-so-often bible study to keep up appearances? There can be panic sometimes- "What if someone thinks I'm backsliding?!" you scream internally. Sometimes all you need to do is talk to someone, someone you know has spiritual wisdom. You'll soon be wearing your running gear for practice again.
"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize" - 1 Cor 9.24
This doesn't mean run faster than everyone else, be stronger than everyone else or eat better. This means run the race YOU were intended. It means don't get discouraged and become unfit. It means be strong and courageous because God is with you. It means feed your spirit with the truth.
Guys I know this was long, but it needed to be out and down on this page. If you even get to this point, pray about what aspect of the runner do you need? The important thing to remember is that you're never the only person. Everyone needs to slow down sometimes. Everyone gets bettered by the wind, and everyone needs to walk for a little while sometimes. But we need to remember it's never in our strength we're running.
AMEN.
Feedback xo
Things began to get in the way, and when I couldn't get to the gym so much any more, my body slowly began to shrink back to pre- fit fanatic Jen. Needless to say, I didn't notice to much at first but after a little while, I started to eat bread again ( I know! The horror) only brown bread... once in a while...
Back in July 2013 God really picked me up off my rear end and gave me a swift kick up it in the right direction again. My spiritual fitness became unlike anything I'd ever known before. It was realer than ever; more fervent than ever. I fell in love deeper and stronger with the Savior than ever before. I was training spiritually, praying, serving, reading and everyone knew it. Since then there's been growth like never before.
God had spoken, was speaking, was using me. It was incredible. It is incredible. 2014 has just finished. A year unlike anything I've every experienced. Where the Heavens rain, sometimes it will flood. This has been the most difficult yet prosperous year of my life so far.
However, not unlike my physical blossoming, my spiritual training will not always be at that constant high.
I've been feeling that down recently. Feeling the lack of motivation to seek Christ like I did even several months ago. Surely the same Lord who did all these wondrous is motivation enough to seek and praise? It should be. But I've began to find myself in the same depletion and the previously mentioned physical state.
The night before Christmas eve, I stayed with a relative and I took my bible with me. I decided on my night of relaxation I would read, and pray, and see if God would speak. Who was I kidding, of course He would. I opened to Revelations and began to read the first chapter. As I read I saw it spoke of the different churches. Many times I've heard my pastor speak of the Church of Laodicea- the church that needs nothing. There was also the church of the Ephesians.
Now, Ephesians is my favorite letter from Paul. I just always feel like it's the most applicable; the most relatable to the modern church serving today, a reminded to never forget the first love of Christ. And within this chapter of Revelations, I realised I am becoming what I always dreaded I would become- I'm becoming cold; unfit. Beginning to eat the white bread of this world again- beginning to forget the blessings joy and strength only accumulated through Christ himself.
Just like my burst of gyming and fitness, my spiritual bloom has began to whither down slightly- almost as of the radioactive- glow is burning off. That which I never wanted to happen.
I have to say though. I did not become "unfit" after I stopped going to the gym. I became merely a
less strong, toned version of my prior self.
As I said. I've been in a kind of suckie place recently, feeling almost depressed. Perhaps there are several causes which I shan't delve into but I know for sure a positive mental attitude is not enough to "pull me up". I went for a run tonight with my father, after having one of those struggling to be human days. The first run of this year, and in about a month and a half. The first 70% wasn't bad! Almost easy in fact. There was a little wind but nothing significant that could hold me back. The second part of our route was heavily uphill. We walked about a hundred meters around the corner at the bottom of the big hill for a short rest, then went for the incline- at a quicker pace. Deep breath and off we trodded. And it was difficult. I didn't get far before I had to pause again. This incline brought a change of direction which meant the wind was now against us and genuinely stronger. After several defeatist stops I was still in a foul mind, and said aloud, "God seriously why does there have to be wind against me right now?!" Oh, hello Holy spirit! The answer was almost entirely representative of what was happening in my life.
We're all running a race. If we're surrendered to Christ, we're called to run the race with endurance. There will always be hills. Sometimes up, sometimes down. There will be wind sometimes, and sometimes it will be against you.
I approached my waiting father he asked me about my bad mood. I explained my anger about the difficulty and we pressed on together as he encouraged me a little each time. Eventually I told him to run on without me as I slowed to a walk. Again I prayed aloud as though I was having Revelations of my own.
I knew that as soon as I ran again, I would be on my way to safety; to home; back to my daddy. I knew that this wind was shaping endurance in me. This hill reminding me it's not always easy. My father reminding me Jesus is not far away.
Revelations 2 verse 7 says - "To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree
of life, which is in the Paradise of God."
To him who overcomes, there is victory. There's a right in paradise so eat in the glory of God. Not just physical nutrients, but spiritual fruit in the presence of Christ. That's pretty awesome. There's constant battles, hills and winds in this life. Sometimes you need to slow down, sometimes you need to start running again. We all have our own race but we need to know that we need to stay fit spiritually. This life is not a sprint. If we start a marathon at our fastest pace, we'll be done not 5 minutes in. If we pace ourselves, nourish ourselves in the word and drink of the living water and eat the living bread, we won't become tired. We can face the wind and hills. We don't need to sprint in everything, but rely steadily on the promises of Jesus, moreso the personal promises.
Another thing the Ephesians were famous for was their image. They acted and spoke as though they were still serving God from the heart- they dressed like an athlete although they didn't train like an athlete. Sometimes I wear my gym leggings around the house because it's comfier than jeans to chill in. Same idea- are you dressed in your Holy Holister's and Nikes (no copyright) so that you'll look as though you're running when really you're doing the gym posers so you can instagram the every-so-often bible study to keep up appearances? There can be panic sometimes- "What if someone thinks I'm backsliding?!" you scream internally. Sometimes all you need to do is talk to someone, someone you know has spiritual wisdom. You'll soon be wearing your running gear for practice again.
"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize" - 1 Cor 9.24
This doesn't mean run faster than everyone else, be stronger than everyone else or eat better. This means run the race YOU were intended. It means don't get discouraged and become unfit. It means be strong and courageous because God is with you. It means feed your spirit with the truth.
Guys I know this was long, but it needed to be out and down on this page. If you even get to this point, pray about what aspect of the runner do you need? The important thing to remember is that you're never the only person. Everyone needs to slow down sometimes. Everyone gets bettered by the wind, and everyone needs to walk for a little while sometimes. But we need to remember it's never in our strength we're running.
AMEN.
Feedback xo